Making Friends Is Hard

All my life I've found it tough to make friends. I still have quite a few friends I made as a child growing up in a small town. Those friends are amazing, because they've stuck around this long. I thank them for that. Making friends as an adult is the hardest though.

Making friends is hard enough, but making them as an adult is even harder. I'm often shy when meeting new people, but once I get to know you I come out of my shell. Being in a crowd of people intimidates me too. I'm much more relaxed around a smaller group of friends. Circumstances don't always allow for comfort though. I suppose I probably have to bust out of my comfort zone if I ever want to make new friends!

My husband and I left Colorado almost two years ago, and we just moved to a new city in Florida this past January. That doesn't make it easier to have friends. Sometimes it feels like we're in that awkward in-between phase of married life where we aren't quite newlyweds anymore but have no children either. It's almost like we aren't sure where we fit at the moment. We aren't sure we want to make a life in Florida either. Awkward. Kind of like middle school all over again.

For anyone out there who moves a lot...
where do you meet new friends?

What Makes Me Happiest

Plenty of things make me happy, but today I'm sharing just 10 of the things that make me really happy. That's like picking 10 favorite items from your entire closet. I have some obvious favorites, but it's really hard limiting yourself to so few things.

Without further ado, the 10 things that make me really happy:

Family and Friends

My husband recently surprised me with a trip to Michigan for my 30th birthday. I had a wonderful surprise party that included my parents and some of my closest friends. Way.To.My.Heart. I was so excited and energized by spending some time back home with people I love!

family and friends

Golden Retrievers

I seriously cannot help myself whenever I see someone walking a golden, and I always stop what I'm doing to admire it. This is particularly dangerous for me whenever I see a golden retriever while driving. They are the best dogs in the whole wide world. My dog growing up was a golden, and I think I need another one soon. Hint, hint husband!

Travel

Every time I travel, it's like a fun little adventure. Who doesn't love a good adventure? It's like taking part in your very own movie. I suppose that should be what life is anyways, but traveling makes life feel like even more of an exciting story to me. Let's explore something new! I want to see it all. Travel just makes me giddy like a 5 year old in a candy store. Just ask my husband. I'm not much of a morning person, but I will wake up at 3am with a smile on my face just to catch a flight!

me and my golden . : : . snapshot of a castle in Bellinzona, Switzerland
flying over Lake Mead on our way to Las Vegas . : : . me, my grandparents, and my pup

Birdwatching

So what if I may be the only 30 year old birdwatcher in Florida. It's the coolest new hobby around, haven't you heard? I absolutely love watching the birds, and I don't just mean watching the local birds eat from a backyard feeder. (Although that's perfectly acceptable too.) I love going out into the woods with my binoculars and searching for new birds to add to my life list. Birdwatching is such a peaceful hobby, and I think it's fun learning about bird behaviors. I'm pretty happy with a pair of binoculars and some birds calling in the distance.

The Lake

When I say the lake makes me happy, I'm mostly talking about the one where I grew up in Michigan. There is just nothing like listening to the peaceful lapping of waves at the shoreline while you walk through fresh dew in the yard. The ocean is great, but it doesn't do the same thing for me as the lakes in northern Michigan. Alligators infest the lakes in Florida, but the lakes in Michigan are pure and clean. That lake is where I've done some of my best thinking. There's just nothing that compares!

female cardinal . . : : . . the lake where I grew up in Michigan

sculpture outside of the Sheraton in Denver . . : : . . the Rocky Mountains

Denver, Colorado

I spent five years of my life living in Colorado, and I even met my husband there. Denver was where I had my first "big kid" job. It's where I wandered museums, enjoyed the shining sun, had engagement pictures taken, listened to music from street performers, and countless other great and inspiring things. That place is alive with culture, art, and energy. I just love it!

The Mountains

It wouldn't be fair to not include the mountains in the list of things that make me happy. I did live with both lakes and mountains in my life for years. That might be why I loved Switzerland so much. It really had the best of both those worlds, the mountains and the lakes. Not only are the mountains great for snowboarding, they are absolutely beautiful during the summertime too. Dominating but beautiful, full of fresh air and life.

Music

This is something that's always made me happy. Listening to music reminds me of where I came from, because I have so many musical people in my family. I even played the saxophone in band at one point. My uncles and dad are all very musical, and my cousin currently plays the violin. She's spectacular at playing! Needless to say, I love music. We've been to various concerts, and I can't get enough of the sweet sound of music to my ears.

one of our engagement photos by Alison Rose Photography

outside of The Incredible Christmas Place . : : . music to my ears . : : . my love

Christmas Stores

These places make me happy, because they are filled to the brim with everything Christmas. The smell of pine trees, peppermint, and the holidays. Sounds of carols, train sets, and crackling fires fill the air. I have already mentioned Christmas stores on this blog, but I can't help it since they make me so darn happy. It's near impossible for me to pass by a Christmas store without going inside.

Love

Lastly... love makes me happy. Sometimes I think that wedding photographers have the best job in the world, because they get the chance to document people's happiest days. I am happiest when surrounded by people who love and accept me. It's also a wonderful thing to love someone else. Love someone. It just might make you happy too!

What makes you happy?

Self Confidence Can Be Fragile

If only I was good at listening to my own advice. Like pretty much anyone else on earth, I want to be liked and appreciated. If nobody liked me, it would be a pretty lonely life. However, some people are worth your time and others are not. Either way, don't let someone's opinion affect your self confidence.
It's up to you to determine who you need to protect yourself from and who you should keep close. Even the people who love you the most will say things that hurt you. It's not because they mean to, but it's because nobody is perfect.
Growing up my mom used to voice her displeasure at some of the questionable items of clothing I liked. None of them were inappropriate, unless you deem ugly polyester shirts and flower patterned jeans to be out of line. I never let her opinion of my clothing choice bother me though. I used to laugh and tell her that she's lucky she didn't have to wear my clothes. I wore what I liked!
What's most important is how you feel about yourself. Let's be honest, confidence is sexy. It's hard feeling confident when you're worried about what everyone thinks of your skin, clothing, hair color, etc. No one will notice something's out of place if you exude confidence. Stop all that worrying and own it! 

That Dreaded Question

Today in the land of Blog Every Day In May, Jenni has prompted us to answer the question "what do you do?" The catch is, you can't answer with your job. Thank goodness, because I don't currently have a job anyways. At least not one that brings in any real income.

my life isn't over just because I don't work in an architecture firm anymore

Back to that dreaded question of what do you do. It's awkward answering that question when you don't have a job. It usually ends with feeling the need to explain yourself, and that's never fun. No one should ever have to prove themselves worthy of acceptance or love. Those things are to be given freely no matter what kind of job a person does, or doesn't have. A job title alone doesn't tell anyone who you are, it just shows what you do for a living.

For too long I beat myself up over not having a job, and the last thing I needed was anyone else making me feel worthless for it too. Choosing to accept someone for who they are is one of the best gifts you could ever give. It took me some time realizing that applied to myself as well. Accepting yourself, faults and all, is one of the most important things you can do for your own well-being.

We can learn a great deal about acceptance by sitting down and talking with someone who's taking a different path in life. What's right for one person may not be right for another. We all make different choices in life. To each his/her own.

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To answer Jenni's prompt today, I'm answering with a list of some choices I make in life...

- - I love my husband.

- - My family and friends are often on my mind & in my thoughts.

- - I give money to homeless people. Who cares what they need it for. They clearly need some love.

- - Gossip has no place in my life. It's plain mean

- - I put a great amount of care into most everything I do. I don't like to half-ass anything.

- - When people tell me their difficulties in life, I do my best to listen without judging.

- - I hand write thank you notes when people do nice things for me.

- - I look for beauty in the world and enjoy sharing it.

- - Sometimes I even make beautiful things.

- - Laughter is good for you, so I try and take time to laugh about things.

I love getting to know someone before bringing up what they do for a living. People have so much more to offer the world than just their job. One of my favorite questions to ask someone I just met is where are you from? Obviously your hometown doesn't tell everything, but it gets the ball rolling in terms of getting to know some one's background and life. Everyone has a story, and one little piece of that story, for instance a job title, doesn't tell the whole picture. I'd hope one could look past my job status and really get to know me.

The Importance of Purpose in Life

Finding life purpose is something I think we all struggle with, or have struggled with, at some point in time. I know plenty of people who question their current career path, have wondered what they'll do after a layoff, or are just plain unhappy with their direction in life. There are also the people who just tough out each week at a job they hate, because they don't know what else they would do. I've been there, and I still sometimes wonder what's in store for me. Purpose seems to be one of those ever elusive creatures that you just hope to stumble upon some day. Then when you find it, you don't want to let go.

I don't think there's a magical equation that will help you find your purpose. There are plenty of career help books out there, and none of them will be able to tell you exactly what you should do. Your heart is probably the best place to turn, because it's been with you all along. Deep down, I think we all really know what makes us happiest. It's just that over the years we've had circumstances and people that quiet our heart. They tell us we're not good enough, fast enough, big enough, or smart enough to do what we really want. I say forget all those things and do what really makes your heart happy. You probably know best which direction to go.

Finding our purpose is important, because it reminds us that we do belong here (wherever that may be). We were all put here for a reason. Knowing that reason, whatever it may be, makes us better people. All we can do is try our hardest to give back to this crazy world the gifts that were given to us. It's either that or let them go to waste, and that would be a shame.

A Birthday to Remember

My husband surprised me with a trip to Michigan for my 30th birthday. I still cannot believe it's been just longer than a week since I found out we were going to spend my big day in the wintry north. People always say this, but time really does fly when you're having fun. This certainly was a birthday to remember.

Our trip to Michigan was such a whirlwind trip, it almost felt like it never happened. Thankfully I have the pictures to prove it did. I'll never forget being surprised by so many smiling faces    and cake and balloons. I also brought home a cold from Michigan, so I will keep this short.

It's always nice seeing a familiar face. Seeing snow on my birthday was an added bonus. Hopefully we'll get back to Michigan again soon!

Now I'm going to nurse my cold and possibly take a few days off from the blog world. For those observant readers out there, my hair is darker (thanks to my friend Amber) than before our trip to Michigan. I hope you're all having a lovely week. Stay healthy!

For My Mom

Today is my mother's birthday, and I'm grateful for every year I have her here. Her mother, my grandmother who I never met, passed away from cancer when my mom and aunt were only teenagers. Two young girls without a mother lost their father a short 20 days later. Even though that isn't something we talk about often, my mother's loss sticks with me until this day. I'm very grateful that my mother is here to celebrate another birthday today. Happy Birthday, Mom!

As a teenager, you often know more than your parents. You have no idea how precious your parents are until you think of losing them. That can be said for most people in your life, so don't forget to tell people you love them. It makes my heart hurt to think my mother was never able to see her parents celebrate birthdays when she was in her 20s and 30s like me. It's just so hard to imagine.

My mother has taught me many valuable things through the years. She raised me to be intelligent and to never dumb myself down for anyone, especially boys. I always saw her with a book in her hands, and she can play a mean game of Scrabble too. Those brains run in the family. My mom never let me get sucked into the vanity of being a teen girl. There was never encouragement to dye my hair, wear a face full of makeup, or dress in revealing clothing. She taught me to love myself the way I was made. I'm forever grateful for having a mother who never made me feel inadequate.

Now that we live far apart, we don't see each other as much as I wish we could. She still welcomes me with a favorite meal on the table when I visit to this day. It's not always the things she says but often the things she does that stick with me the most.

I'm thankful to still have my mother here, because I know that isn't always the story for everyone. Unfortunately I don't get to be with her today in Michigan, but she is close in heart. Hey Mom, Florida is calling you to get away from the snowy north. Happy Birthday! We love you.

{ wedding pictures by Alison Rose Photography }

Let's Talk About Labels

How do you label yourself? We're all rather unique individuals, yet we share common ground too. Most likely one word, or label, does not fully describe you.

This time of year, election time that is, brings out the very best and sometimes also the very worst in people. People judge others solely by their political affiliation. Two little words. Democrat. Republican. Those two words mean so many different things. Yet people quickly make assumptions about someone simply by using their political label. People are far too special and complex to be simply described by one word. Could you describe yourself using only one word? If not, then why judge others using one label alone?

It's amazing how one word, or label, often immediately elicits an assortment of thoughts and feelings about someone. Jock. Geek. Redneck. Millionaire. Poor. Politician. Salesman. Unemployed. You can imagine plenty of scenarios that go with each of those words. One word alone doesn't always paint a full picture of a person. You know what happens when you assume, right?

A more appropriate label is probably made of many words. Currently, my label may read something like this: wife-daughter-niece-cousin-friend-chef-nurturer-intellect-introvert-extrovert-photographer-traveler-thinker-gardener-artist-athlete-comedian-scientist-empath-helper-writer-wanderer-bibliophile-foodie-nerd. We're always learning and growing, and labels adapt accordingly. They are not static things, and neither are people. If we label others, let's at least try and label them correctly.

Your combination of labels may not be, word for word, exactly the same as mine, but I bet there's a chance that you'll find at least one word in there we share. Try looking for similarities, and we just might find common ground in an overlapping label. Don't be so quick to label someone, because you might discover you had the wrong label all along. Maybe you'll even learn to label someone as friend and not enemy.

Respect differences and similarities. They're what makes the world go round.

{ different isn't bad... it's just different }

Letting Go

From the perspective of someone who can be quite the perfectionist at times, I know how difficult it can be to let go. I had a cute green security blanket that I slept with for quite a while, and I sucked my thumb until I was older than five. Awesome. I know. Those things aside, it's hard letting to. We grow up and must let go of all the expectations we had for life as a child, because, quite frankly, things change. Life all around us changes. Little disturbances create big waves, because we hold onto something too tightly. We cling to people, places, or things that make us feel safe and comfortable. It often takes a little bit of faith, some honesty with ourselves, and a whole lot of trust, but letting go allows us to really live this beautiful life.

a view from above...

For someone who often struggles, but is getting better at dealing, with life's curve balls, I really enjoy flying for some odd reason. I absolutely love it, flying that is, not the crying babies and crowded airports part. For the few hours I'm in an airplane flying from point a to point b, I feel like there's no worry in the world. Zooming through the sky at 20 or 30-something thousand feet is almost therapeutic to me. I know that all you anxious fliers out there are trying to figure out how anyone could ever feel relaxed and peaceful in an airplane, but I just do. It's hard to explain the exact feeling.

All I know is that flying isn't much different than life. We're zooming along at cruising altitude, there are ups and downs, and every once in a while there's some turbulence thrown in just to shake things up, literally. All I know is that flying, like life, takes some faith and knowing that everything will work out just fine. I certainly don't want to die after having lived my life in a fearful state of mind all the years I've lived. Have faith that you'll arrive safely at your destination, and hopefully you enjoy the ride, and the view, along the way.

clouds or not, the view is grand

If only I could apply that mentality I have in flying to every waking moment of life. If I could let go half as good as I fly peacefully, things would flow much smoother around here. Life's curve balls, or turbulent patches, would not seem nearly as severe with a little faith that everything will be fine. Sometimes knowing in your heart that a safe landing awaits is all you need to get through a rough patch. Knowing. It's so much easier said than done, but it's worth a shot. What do you have to lose? Let go.

Never Forget

This blog post doesn't need any images,

because I think the images are still fairly clear in most of our minds...

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Eleven years ago:

I'll never forget riding the bus back to my dorm room after a morning college class. During that bus ride I overheard a couple other students mention a plane crash. I remember being saddened just thinking about a plane crash, and I hoped that no one had been hurt. After the bus ride, I finally arrived at my dorm and walked inside to discover that every single dorm room door was open. It seemed odd at the time, but I did not think too much of it. However, while walking down the corridor I noticed everyone sitting in front of their televisions, and I quickly realized the seriousness of the events that took place that day. It took me a few moments to connect what I overheard on the bus with what was unfolding on every television in America.

I will never forget the lives lost, the destruction that took place, and the scar that was left on all of our hearts. That day reminded us of the evil on earth, but it was also a great display of the good that comes through those who help when others are in need. Let us all be united by good. May we heal old wounds with kindness and love and not hate. September 11th was a day when we all learned just how fragile life can be, and it reminded us all to hold our loved ones a little bit closer.

I will never forget that day.

Something Beautiful for Your Weekend

First of all, thank you all for the nice comments from yesterday's post about my new haircut. I was beyond grateful for each kind word you all left for me. Thank you!

Second, this past week I had a wonderful week (almost) in Michigan visiting my family and friends. I did not take quite as many pictures as I would have liked, but I did get some that only begin to show you the beauty of northern Michigan. As each year passes, I learn to appreciate it even more. I am blessed to have grown up in such a naturally beautiful and quaint little town.

I grew up on an incredible lake, that I definitely took for granted at the time, but now I understand what a rarity it was to grow up with such a special place as my "backyard". Seeing a couple of meteorites shoot across the sky on my first night in town almost made me want to never leave. If only my husband had been there too, maybe we would have stayed.

I hope you all have a beautiful weekend. May you get a chance to do something that you love or at least spend some time with loved ones. If not, get outside and at least appreciate the beauty that surrounds you. What are you plans for this weekend?

Happy Friday!

Things That Break My Heart

This blog post unfortunately isn't about 'bliss' or happy things.

Recently I've experienced some things that truly make my heart ache.

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Divorce

Obviously this word alone sounds sort of painful,

but when you see firsthand the effects it has on families and individuals,

it makes me want to cry.

It took everything in me to not 'turn on the waterworks' yesterday at work.

Let me explain.

There was an older woman shopping for new clothes, and I asked her what the occasion for all of the new clothes was. She responded, "I'm getting a divorce." First of all, her answer sort of caught me off guard. I started getting teary-eyed, and it took everything in me to stop the tears. You're never exactly sure what to say when a stranger telling you of their divorce. I said how sorry I was, and then she elaborated by telling me she wanted some nice new clothes for dating. I instantly felt a deep sadness for this woman. Clearly she didn't want this. She went on to tell me how scared she was to date again, and I think that dating in your 20s is scary enough. I could not even imagine entering the 'dating scene' after years of marriage! I attempted comforting her by telling her that she will meet the perfect man when the time is right, but my heart was aching for this stranger.

I could only imagine the pain of divorce and the effects it has on a person.

My heart breaks for those who deal with divorce.

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Miscarriage

Recently I've read a few blog posts of young couples dealing with a miscarriage. I cannot even begin to imagine the pain of losing an unborn child. Pregnancy is supposed to bring so much happiness and love into a life, and it just seems unfair when that's all taken away in an instant. My heart breaks for those who lose a child. Whether or not that child is unborn or not, miscarriage is such a sad and painful thing.

Again, there never seems to be the 'right' words for those who suffer a miscarriage. One of my husband's co-worker's wives experienced multiple miscarriages (we're talking more than 5 or 6) before finally giving birth to a healthy baby. Talk about faith! They never gave up trying, even through all the pain of loss. It makes me incredibly sad hearing about miscarriage, but it seems to be a part of life. As much as we may hate it, loss is part of life. That doesn't mean we won't weep for those we lose.

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Death

Life is something to celebrate, but of course that idea doesn't make the death of a loved one any easier at the moment. My heart breaks for those who have lost someone dear to them.

Lately I've been having more thoughts about my grandparents who I never had the pleasure of meeting. My mom's parents died, twenty days apart, when her and my aunt were just entering their teenage years. For whatever reason, recently I've been really wondering who they were. What kind of people were they? From the little I have heard, they were very kind and loving souls. I grieve for them, even though I never had the chance to meet them. How do you grieve the loss of someone you've never met? It's a strange thought, but it's possible I suppose.

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Sorry for all of the doom and gloom.

My heart may be a bit heavy as of lately.

All of these painful things break my heart.

If you've experienced some of these things recently, or are still dealing with the effects of them,

know that you are not alone.

Never Say Never

As a young girl, I grew up with a very wonderful friend. Being an only child, she was the one I told my secrets to when I needed to share my fears or my sadness. She just so happened to be of the canine species. Dogs make incredible listeners. I loved her dearly. It just doesn't seem fair that age creeps up much more quickly for dogs, and they're taken from our lives too soon. Maybe their life span is more proportionate to the amount of happiness they bring into our world in such a short time. Their lives rush by in the blink of an eye.

I still remember very vividly the time when our golden retriever's decline seemed to come in like the wind. All along though, it was an inevitable part of her life. She was losing hair all over her body, and she had a very difficult, and obviously painful, time sitting and standing. It was so sad watching such a beloved creature go through pain. She seemed to know it was her time. My mom ended up having her put down on my 10th birthday. I'll never forget her untimely death, but most importantly I still have the most happy memories of her life. She lived.

There was a time when I probably could have been considered a golden retriever purist. All I ever wanted was a purebred golden retriever and nothing else. I would never have thought of having any other breed of dog as my friend. Maybe I thought that would have been "cheating" on Gnomie. I'm pretty sure she would have wanted us to get another puppy, because she wouldn't have wanted us to grieve her forever. I could not imagine anyone grieving someone or some thing's death forever. You should live for them. We cannot truly live if we are hanging on to the past.

{ how can you not love all of these faces? }

all photos via The Daily Puppy

I never thought I would want any other breed of dog but a golden, but I'm open to ideas. I'm sure my husband and I will probably have a golden retriever some day, but until then we just might find ourselves crossing paths with another breed of dog. You never know who, or what, you might love if you open yourself up to it. Never say never.

It Was Painful, But I Did It

Just like kicking any addiction, habit, or vice in life, it was tough making the decision to finally delete my Facebook account. I had new complaints about it with each passing day, and the negatives of having a profile really seemed to outweigh the positives anymore. These are a few of the reasons why I finally bit the bullet and deleted my Facebook account. Call me a traditionalist, but I'm hoping that maybe some day my life will consist of more quality phone calls, emails, and maybe even the elusive snail mail item or two.

It may have been a television program I watched late last week that really kicked my butt into 'Facebook deletion mode', but it was something that had been in the back of my mind ever since my husband deleted his account months ago. It was time for me to draw up enough strength and 'unplug' myself from all of the pseudo connectedness that Facebook made me feel.

Facebook seems to do a wonderful job at making us feel that we have tons of friends (around 400 in my case), but in all reality Facebook was only making it convenient for keeping hundreds of acquaintances at my fingertips. What good was that doing for my quality of life? I don't know about you, but I find that keeping up with relationships can be tiring. Friendships take work, and I feel that Facebook is degrading the definition of 'friends'. Growing up, I was always the kid who wanted a few close friends more than I ever wanted tons of meaningless friendships. I guess I haven't changed much in that department over the years. I will forever be the girl who wants to do things all the way or not do them at all. If you don't really want to be my friend, and you only want to keep me at your fingertips when it suits you, then I would rather be without you as my real life and Facebook friend.

After finally deciding to delete my account, I posted a status update letting my friends know that I would be deleting my account and to email me if they wanted to keep in touch. I received only a couple of comments from friends who let me know they wanted to stay in touch, and I received a couple of emails in my inbox as well. Out of almost 400 Facebook friends, I would say that was right along the lines of failure. Either that or their news feeds were too cluttered with more very important things, like Farmville invites or Spotify song suggestions, to notice that one of their friends would be leaving the world of Facebook. In that case, it solidified my decision. Being part of a human advertising experiment was never all that fun.

There are a lot of people who I miss, and would love to stay in contact with, but I prefer more meaningful methods of communication where you actually hear the other person's voice on the other end. Skype me! It's like an old-fashioned phone call but with video included. I'm not saying goodbye to all technology, just the ones that don't make me a better person. And yes, I do everything I can to not answer my cell phone during dinner. Like I said, call me old fashioned.

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Below you can see the video of me actually going through the process
of deleting my Facebook account.

Yes this is actually me.... I rarely wear my glasses.
Try not to laugh.

* I really struggled with the captchas, they don't make those easy do they? *

Did you know that deactivating your Facebook and

permanently deleting it are two completely different things?

{ you can read more about that here }

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I hope to use my new found 'free' time post-Facebook for learning, reading, writing, and

maybe even sending the occasional letter and thank you note via snail mail.

In the words of my high school art teacher,

who was always one of my very favorites,

"Quality over quantity!"

{ Thank you Mrs. Fuller! }

* oh and if you're wondering.... I haven't missed Facebook at all.

I Cried at Work

First of all, my job is pretty great. It's a dog friendly place, and there are quite a few customers who visit with their dogs in tow. Some customers even push their dogs in doggy strollers. It's rather cute. Me crying has nothing to do with a bad experience at work, but it has more to do with heart touching moment.

Just a few days ago, there was a local pet masquerade featuring plenty of dogs in costume. I even saw a dachshund with a tiny stuffed cowboy in its back. Adorable! The real tearjerker though was an older golden retriever without a costume. The owners were incredible friendly, and we got to talking about how much they love their dogs. I told them I grew up with a golden retriever, and we bonded a bit over what incredible pets golden retrievers make. I asked them if they had ever read Dean Koontz's book A Big Little Life and she said they had not read it. This is when the tears formed on my lower eye lids and I wiped a couple away before they had the chance to trickle down my cheek. I miss my beloved golden retriever Gnomie. Sometimes seeing people with a golden, quite often one that looked like mine, is just enough to make me misty-eyed.

After the first couple of tears in my eyes, their golden came my way and let me massage her soft ears, which was always something I loved doing to my own dog, Gnomie. They told me about how they rescued their second dog from a shelter, and while talking about how much my husband and I would love having a golden some day, their golden came over to me and pushed her head up against my leg. It was almost as if she was letting me know it was okay to cry. Many dogs possess the ability of knowing exactly when we need a little comforting. It was very touching speaking with these people, and I was very thankful for the opportunity. The woman even came back up to the register before leaving and thanked me. I'm still not exactly sure what she thanked me for, because I feel very thankful for getting the chance to pet their dog and talk with them about their animals.

Animals, especially dogs, have such an amazing ability to soften our hearts and make us want to become better people. I am hopeful for the day when my husband and I get to have our own golden retriever. They are sometimes the best at comforting a sad heart. It's okay to cry, and dogs will always be there to wipe away a tear without judgement. They offer endless unconditional love. What a gift.

Home is Here, There, and Everywhere

Yesterday, on the way to work, I found myself quietly wondering about the definition of 'home'. I was born in Texas, grew up in northern Michigan, lived about the last five years in Colorado, and now my husband and I live on the west coast of Florida. Instead of feeling homesick and sorry for myself, I really need to redefine what home means, and home has a rather flexible definition.

{ please bear with me, this is sort of a long one }

If you want a very simple definition of home, it would be the house where you live. However, home is not just a physical location or roof over your head. One quote about home that really seems to ring true for me reads "home is where the heart is". If you ask me, that quote alone is very simple and complex at the same time.

After thinking about the meaning of "home is where the heart is", some things really began to click for me. A very simple and literal definition of heart would be the organ in your chest that pumps blood and keeps things flowing. Now if you get more theoretical, your heart is who you are. It's who you love. It's your beliefs and convictions. One definition from the dictionary even defines heart as "one's innermost character, feelings, or inclinations". If home is where your heart is, then home should be wherever you are, right? No one can take away your character... or your heart. I may be currently residing in my fourth state now, but that doesn't mean that I should feel a constant homesickness. If you learn to be at home with yourself wherever you are, then home is always wherever you are, right? Foreclosure may take away the roof over your head, but no one can ever take away your home.

The definition of home is simple but complex. It's not always easy feeling at home wherever you are. People often deal with fears, insecurities, anger, or feel out of their comfort zones at times. Feeling at home should be something we all feel no matter where we are, but it's often easier said than done. If we strengthen our hearts, our character, and our ability to love, then aren't we essentially growing our home?

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Thank goodness for my husband and his kindness towards me. He typically deals with my moodiness better than I do. I recently went on a stretch of a few days where I was missing friends and family, and he gave me a darling card with a little girl and boy on the front. They were sitting next to the sea, fitting since we now live near the sea, and inside the card I found this quote: "Paradise is always where the love dwells" by Jean Paul Richter. My husband reminded me that we're in this together, and our home is wherever we are together.

Thankfully, my husband's new job brought us to Florida where we can be together more often. His last pilot job kept him away from home a lot, and he no longer has to 'overnight' anymore. Unfortunately we are both further away from friends and family, but we are enjoying spending more time together growing our definition of home. I am grateful for the opportunities we've been given, and I hope to continue learning to be at home no matter where we may reside.

"Home" by Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros

One Thing

If there is one thing I hope to do with my life it would be to help people. There are endless ways to make that happen. I could become a nurse. Maybe I could even become a neurosurgeon and help people with brain injuries. Another way I can help people is by becoming a police officer and helping protect people and maybe even save lives. I could also become a teacher and help shape young minds, and maybe I could even teach children to love one another and never give up on their dreams. Oh! I could also become a business owner and create jobs in this tumultuous economy. Seriously, the possibilities are endless.

Even though all of the above options are great and honorable, one thing I've learned over the years is that I can help people without the status that comes from a job title. You see. I went to college and graduated with a degree in architecture. After being laid off from my architecture job, it felt like many people thought more highly of me when I was working in an architecture firm. A job title does not make one person more valuable than another. I feel that people who are quietly working to make others happy are often overlooked. The one thing we must all keep in mind is a drive to help each other in some way. No matter what our job title may be, big or small, we possess the ability to change lives. Everyone serves a valuable role in life no matter what their job may be.

How often do you experience someone being genuinely kind to you? It could be the grocery store clerk who took extra care putting the items in your bag, or it may be the stranger who smiled at you on a day when you needed it most. Maybe someone even allowed you extra room while driving to switch lanes in front of them. All of those people had you in mind, and they helped you in some of the seemingly smallest ways. We are all capable of doing these small things, but how often do we actually do them? We don't have to get our college degree in law, or even become a surgeon, to play a significant part in life. Every day is an opportunity to make a difference. Start small and grow your desire to help others. Even the tallest trees started from a seed. A little kindness goes a long way.

If I can do one thing today, I hope that maybe I can make someone smile. Maybe I'll even lend an ear to someone who just needs a person to listen to their problems. I may even help make some one's day a little easier by smiling at them, or I could hold a door when another person's hands are full. There are endless opportunities to be kind to others, and all too often we forget to take advantage of them. We may be too preoccupied by our own busy lives, but taking a moment to search for ways to help another person instantly reminds you of life's purpose to help each other. If I can do one thing today, I hope to help make someone else's life slightly better. Maybe I'll even get a smile out of them. We're all capable of doing one thing. What will you do today?

* be a light in someone's life *