I honestly find myself getting into trouble when I don't really know what I want to do... like now, for instance. My unemployment has given me a lot of time to think and reflect and figure out what it is that I really want to do for a living... although I don't think I'm quite there yet. I'm getting closer, and when I get there and decide what it is I'm going to set my mind to... I won't be stopped. That's just the way I am. When I know what I want, I go for it. Make the decision to do something, and then do it. Sometimes it seems like the hardest part is deciding what to do for a living. I know very few people who knew exactly what they wanted to do at a young age, and I know even fewer who love what they do. I think part of my problem with graduating from college with a degree in architecture is that I never really wanted to do it... I didn't enjoy it... and I could never really picture myself in that role. I think it's so important to set goals for yourself, reach for your dreams, and to not listen to what others tell you to do, because quite honestly your gut instincts usually know what's right for you. So make some decisions (that seems to be one of the hardest parts), set goals, and go for them.
Sometimes I think if I just followed my own advice I'd be in much better shape, but there's no time like now to start following it. I typically have the best of intentions, and I would like to have some great ones for myself. My goal for the future is to do less thinking and analyzing and more action! Now I just need to follow through with that. Instead of worrying about what might happen if I do things, I should worry more about what would happen if I didn't do them. I hope to become better at failing, because, to be honest, the more I fail the more I'll learn... about myself and my capabilities. I know I'm not a failure, but sometimes it sure feels like it. My strengths sometimes fade to the background when I get down on myself, and I hope to remember everything that I am good at... instead of focusing on what I'm no so good at doing.
The worst thing that could happen is never trying something that I could be great at, and I would never know how good I could be at it. So I hope to keep that in mind and try every and anything that sparks my interest. Why not, right? I'll end with some lyrics of a song from Rent.
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"No Day But Today"
The heart may freeze or it can burn The pain will ease if I can learn There is no future There is no past Thank God this moment's not the last There's only us There's only this Forget regret-- or life is yours to miss. No other road No other way No day but today There's only yes Only tonight We must let go To know what is alright No other course No other way No day but today I can't control My destiny I trust my soul My only hope is just to be There's only now There's only here Give in to love Or live in fear No other path No other way No day but today
Graduating... not a failure.
Studying abroad for 6 weeks... not a failure.
Happiness in love... definitely not a failure!
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I just might take a look at things that I have accomplished and remind myself that they are not failures. I've learned so much, and I don't ever want to stop learning. I want to keep growing. Here's to a new way of looking at failures and success! :)